digitizedsouls | (psl) tell me, is it blood on my lips?

["Complicated" is probably the best word to describe the entire history of Diluc and Kaeya's relationship. It's had its highs and lows, buoyed by shared history and magnetic attraction while also weighed down by tragedy and vampiric secrets. At its lowest point, Diluc had been too blinded by hurt feelings and stubbornness to acknowledge how much he missed when the two of them were inseparable. But slowly, surely, Kaeya found his way back into his guarded heart.

It's been months since the last vestiges of the walls fell. Their relationship isn't perfect--the issues between them didn't magically vanish, of course--but it's more than enough for him. On the rare occasions where their schedules align and they can share a bed for the entire night, Diluc presses in close and swears, despite the impossibility of it, that he can feel Kaeya's heartbeat.

- - -

Even when their relationship was at its most strained, there's no one Diluc would rather have fighting at his side than Kaeya. They work in perfect tandem, dexterity and grace matched with strength and power. It's a good thing, especially in situations like this one where all has gone to hell.

What was supposed to be simple reconnaissance with the possibility of having to pick off a few outer patrols has turned into a full-on confrontation with the Abyss. He wouldn't go so far as to say that the two have been overwhelmed, but they're certainly fighting with everything that they have to get out of this encounter in one piece.

In the fray, something sharp pierces deeply into Diluc's side. He pays it no mind, turning and unleashing a fiery swing of his claymore toward the unfortunate Cryo Abyss mage that caused the puncture. He can worry about tending to injuries when the danger has passed. Adrenaline and anger can carry him through until then.

The mage screeches in pain and teleports away from Diluc and toward what it believes to be the less aggressive of the two.]

Kaeya, behind you!

Edited 2023-05-27 19:39 (UTC)

[ complicated is the only word one could use to describe their connection, and kaeya thinks it is not even a strong enough descriptor. they've been tangled up in one another since they were children, inextricably part of one another's lives, and while kaeya's secrets threatened to tear them apart, they have made it through to the other side. scarred, perhaps, but together. that's all kaeya could ever really want. diluc is his family. the only person in the world who truly knows kaeya, all of him, in every way he could be known.

it was a relief, to be able to simply be.. him, to set down the mask every once in awhile.

they fight like one creature, each making up for the other's lack, bolstering one another's strengths in an elegant dance of fire and ice. kaeya's blood is singing rapturously as they carve through their enemies - it feels good, good to fight with diluc, good to simply be with him, working together, a shred of what they once were.

kaeya scents blood on the air, but that's neither new, nor surprising. though it makes his hunger spike and his pulse leap, he ignores it for now - it wouldn't be the first time diluc was injured in their bouts, and surely it wouldn't be the last. they'd see to his wounds after the battle. so kaeya turns immediately at diluc's call, slicing neatly through the abyss mage as it charges its attack; it crumples at kaeya's feet. ]

- Is that the last of them?

[Diluc doesn't respond right away, focusing his attention instead on finishing up the last of the hilichurls that accompanied the mage. He feels something hot and wet flow from the left side of his chest, but until the coast is clear he considers the sensation to be little more than a distraction.

The last body falls, and he takes a few moments to catch his breath... only to realize that he can't. He feels simultaneously like he's drowning and being suffocated, and everything around him starts to spin. With alarming clarity when compared to the way everything else feels sluggish, he remembers the flow from his chest. He reaches up with trembling fingers and looks down to assess what it is.

It's blood. His blood. And a lot of it.

He attempts to turn to face Kaeya, dimly aware that he still hasn't answered the question. More than that, he needs an anchor, something stable and someone familiar to cling to. Unfortunately, before he can finish the turn the world lurches. Powerless against the sensation, he collapses.]

[ it isn't until kaeya turns again that he realizes that the scent of blood has grown stronger, more plentiful, cloying sweet and simultaneously sharp and coppery. something squeezes around his heart, briefly, but in the quick seconds before diluc collapses, kaeya is able to convince himself that everything is fine.

it's diluc, after all. he's a madman, a powerhouse. he's all but immortal. nothing could take him down.

but then diluc is crumpling, his eyelids low, and kaeya charges forward in a flash, only barely reaching his sworn brother's side in time to catch him before he hits the ground hard. diluc's body feels hot as hellfire against kaeya's cool limbs, he's always run hot as a furnace, but it still nevertheless always feels jarring when kaeya is near enough to touch him, especially when it has been some time since he has fed. ]

Hey - hey -

[ kaeya must fight to keep the panic from his voice as he assesses the situation. the scent of blood nearly overwhelming, the sticky patch soaking through diluc's coat, broadening by the second, the wheezing gurgle of his breathing - oh no, oh no no no, this is bad. kaeya's chest tightens around his too-still heart. ]

Don't do this, Luc, all right? Just keep your eyes on me, I'll get you back to the manor -

[Diluc is absolutely a madman, unstoppable force and immovable object both... but he's all too mortal. All it was ever going to take was a bit of carelessness and/or bad luck on his part to end up like this. Either way, he should be furious with himself for letting it happen. But for some reason, the anger doesn't come. Mostly, he just feels numb.

For someone who usually feels things quite acutely, even as he pretends otherwise, that numbness is disquieting.

Kaeya catches him before he hits the ground, and it takes pretty much all of his focus to concentrate on what his sworn brother is saying and follow his instructions. Kaeya's trying to contain his panic, but Diluc sees right through the attempt. They can read each other like books, and now is no exception.

There's a terrible familiarity to this. He knows how painful it is to hold a loved one as he dies. But he can barely think, let alone do anything about it. He just has to hope that Kaeya forgives him for the heartbreak.]

Kae—

[He wants to say more, to lie and say he's all right and that they should head back to the manor, but he's cut off by a painful, bloody cough.]

[ no - no, kaeya will not forgive him for the heartbreak. he will not allow this, will not let diluc get away with leaving him behind. not when he has such a long, long life yet to live, a life he cannot imagine bearing without diluc at his side. they've been together for so very long, equals and opposites in all ways. diluc is his anchor, his balance, his foil, and his greatest love.

and kaeya is far too selfish to let that go. ]

No, please -

[ his facade cracks, panic and anguish clear in his expression, kaeya's eyes wide and bright as he squeezes diluc nearer, heedless of his pain. this isn't the way that this will happen. diluc was meant to grow old beside him, to stay with him as long as his mortal life allowed - not this. not this. that bloody cough makes kaeya's chest constrict. ]

Tell me do do it, Diluc. Tell me, please..

[ he doesn't want to do it without his permission, and yet.. and yet, kaeya is already leaning over him, already pressing sharp fangs to diluc's thready pulse, and biting down. i'm sorry. i'm too weak without you. ]

[Kaeya all but crumbles, pulling Diluc in. The sudden motion and sensation of being held so tightly hurts, but he finds comfort in the gesture all the same. If this is how it all ends for him, he wants to savor this closeness for as long as he's alive enough to perceive it. Kaeya is his world, and Diluc wants to hold onto him until the last.

How this is happening is cruel, and that hurts more than the wound.

He balls his hand into a fist in the fabric of Kaeya's shirt and buries his face into his chest. Kaeya speaks, but the words melt into an incoherent blend of sounds--he's so focused on remaining alive and clinging that he doesn't spare the mental energy on parsing the words. It's not until their respective positions shift enough that Kaeya can sink his fangs into him that he realizes what it is he intends to do.]

Ah--

[His mind races. Should he fight this? He's almost certain that he can't, especially now that he's losing blood both to his wound and Kaeya drinking from him. The more appropriate question is if he wants to fight. And in all honesty, he's not sure he wants to...

The edges of his vision darken, and his body starts to go lax in Kaeya's arms.]

No, no, no - dammit, Luc!

[ he can't handle this, the weight of this responsibility.. it's too much, it's too hard, and kaeya is far, far too weak. the idea of losing diluc here, like this, so suddenly - he can't take it. how can he live without him? how can he possibly face immortality alone, without the only person that has made his life bearable? worth living?

something wrenches in kaeya's gut. ]

I'm sorry.

[ forgive me, diluc.

seizing hold of diluc's limp body harder, kaeya pulls the blood from him in great mouthfuls. it tastes beautiful, hot as hellfire, like no flavor he's known before, and a soft groan vibrates against diluc's skin. kaeya can feel his heartbeat as it weakens, more and more time passing between each fluttering thump, until at last kaeya pulls away with a sharp gasp, blood running down his chin, staining his teeth.

loosing one hand, he tears at his wrist with one fang, opening the delicate skin, his own blood pouring free, which he soon presses to diluc's mouth. ]

[Diluc drinks like a man parched, his mind so clouded by the lack of bloodflow that he's no longer able to debate with himself. The taste is strangely pleasant, crisp and clear like the Cryo of his Vision, and as strength creeps back into him he takes hold of Kaeya's arms and drinks with more fervor.

The Vision at his hip, which has been flickering dangerously ever since he first collapsed, flares back to life.

The next few hours pass in a feverish haze as his body simultaneously heals and dies. He's vaguely aware of being taken somewhere and being set down, at which point he reflexively reaches out and grabs at Kaeya's shirt so that he can't leave him alone. His grip only relaxes when he more or less passes out as his transformation continues to wrack his body.

And then, suddenly, he's awake. He sits bolt upright, looking around the room with no small amount of confusion. Something's wrong. He can feel it.]

Kaeya?

[ it's early in the evening when diluc finally stirs. the curtains have been opened, revealing mondstadt's lovely rolling hills, stars dotting a velvet sky.

kaeya had been here, restless, through diluc's entire transformation, never once leaving his side, even if there was nothing he could do to ease his discomfort and pain. kaeya had been alone, when he'd been turned, turned by a master who cared little for him, and he did not want that for diluc. he shouldn't be alone, right now.

so diluc will find kaeya sitting in a chair beside one of the open windows, the night wind rustling his hair, and the moment diluc sits up, kaeya turns, watching him carefully. being turned is a different process for everyone, and kaeya does not entirely know how diluc will react to it - surely with fire and rage, he thinks. but kaeya is calm, and there's a rare solemnity to his features, his sharp eye heavily lidded, watchful. ]

Good morning.

[Diluc's shoulders visibly relax slightly when he looks over to find Kaeya sitting there. Truth be told, calling out for him had been reflexive rather than a thoughtful act. It's one of the few things that he knows with absolute clarity in this moment: that Kaeya should be here with him right now. Needs to be here with him.

Which begs the question: why does he know that so intrinsically? His recollection of the past while is murky. The two of them were fighting an Abyss stronghold when he had taken a mortal blow. From there, the details blend together into a haze; he remembers being held in Kaeya's arms and being fed something. Afterward came feverish pain. And now, impossibly, he's sitting in bed with hardly a scratch and senses so sharp that the world seems off kilter enough that it's giving him a headache.

...

No. He didn't.

Fuck..]

What did you do?

[There's a noticeable edge to his voice, the question accusation and warning both.]

[ the tone of diluc's voice has kaeya flinching visibly.

it's not like him to be so affected by diluc's moods, his anger, but this.. this is different. this is as heavy as a stone in his stomach. that sharp edge in diluc's voice.. kaeya knows full well he's deserving of it, and worse. he didn't seek diluc's permission for any of this, went into it knowing full well that there was a very good chance that he would never have wanted this, would never have chosen it.

but kaeya couldn't help himself. he's always been selfish. ]

I..

[ he starts, then looks away, because diluc knows full well what kaeya has done. what he has now become. kaeya's voice is soft. ]

I couldn't lose you, Luc.

(psl) tell me, is it blood on my lips?

the 'oh no kaeya's gotta turn diluc' thread

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